


five o’clock in the morning

by siyayeah



Category: Monsta X (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: M/M, Mentioned Jimin, Mutual Pining, yall i rlly dont even kno what to tag??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-09-03 04:43:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8696992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siyayeah/pseuds/siyayeah
Summary: A fire is reignited in Yoo Kihyun that he thought had been exhausted months ago and he realizes the life he's living now simply isn't enough.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [woaixuxi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/woaixuxi/gifts).



> early christmas present for mandie. (rlly i am Impatient n cant wait that long just to post this for her) ((ok late thanksgiving present?? ???......))

The year Kihyun met Yoongi, he was 20. They had been introduced through a mutual friend, with Kihyun not thinking much about it, but Yoongi turns out to be a Total Dork and Kihyun’s smitten. Kihyun comes to realize how easy it is to tease Yoongi, how flustered he’ll get, and soon enough, he becomes so familiar with Yoongi he could recognize him by touch alone, by smell. Kihyun thinks it might be love.

 

Yoongi tries not to think too much about it- it’s not that deep- how his big hands fit nicely with Kihyun’s smaller ones, how Kihyun’s touches lingers and leave a burning sensation, how all they’ll ever be are just friends. Yoongi’s bad, with a capital B, with feelings. He’s awkward and shy and all he wants is to confess, but he can’t be greedy, he can’t ruin a perfectly fine friendship. So he doesn’t.

 

Months, years pass by and eventually, bit by bit, they grow apart. Kihyun hates it, but he’s busy, and Yoongi has better things to do, Kihyun’s only a bother. Calls turn into texts, and texts- turn into nothing. It’s neither one of their faults, really, they just can’t find the time, it sucks and it kinda hurts, Kihyun decides it’s whatever, maybe this was all for the best. It’s been almost 7 months since they’ve last spoken, Kihyun grown tired of receiving texts from Yoongi apologizing for what a shitty friend he’s been (though not like Kihyun’s been any better), how he’ll make it up to Kihyun and they’ll talk soon, only it never happens, the two falling back into the same never ending cycle. The next time Yoongi apologizes, Kihyun doesn’t respond, maybe he’s being childish, but he’s tired and his part-time job is a pain in the fucking ass. He’s tired. They stop talking completely after that.

 

Not long after that, Kihyun meets someone who goes by the name of Wonho. Kihyun likes to think he’s happy, after all, Wonho dotes and takes care of him. Who could be better than Wonho?

 

Kihyun prides himself on having a high alcohol tolerance level, so when Hyungwon invites him to go for a drink with him, Kihyun gladly accepts. What he doesn’t expect is for the two to end up at a club, Hyungwon getting wasted and telling Kihyun not to worry- _“Changkyun will drop by later. He’ll make sure I don’t do dumb shit.”_ Kihyun’s propped himself on a stool by the bar, taking shots of soju just to have something to do since Hyungwon’s on the dance floor. He feels a figure take a seat next to him and ordering themself a drink, reels his head only to discover a much too familiar face. They’re both sat there at a loss for words, Yoongi still awkward as ever.

 

“Oh- I-“ he hears Yoongi begin to say. He’s fiddling with his shot glass, the look on his face evident that he didn’t expect to see Kihyun here. “Hi?”

 

Kihyun forces a smile. He presses his lips into a thin line; it’s weird seeing Yoongi again, where they’re no longer close and suddenly it hits him that he can’t recognize Yoongi by touch alone anymore. He tries to brush it off, everything’s dumb, they’re dumb, and maybe it’s time for them to rekindle the friendship.

 

“It’s been awhile, Yoongi,” he somehow managed to form the words.

 

“It has…what have you been up to?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

One question leads to another, then Kihyun finds himself walking with Yoongi back to his apartment. The walk is short and quiet, Kihyun enjoying the cool air and Yoongi just wanting to step foot into the warmth of his place already. Yoongi’s never been a fan of the cold. Once inside they slip their shoes off, Yoongi telling Kihyun to make himself comfortable on the couch while he fetches them both a snack. Yoongi comes back with a bag of honey butter chips.

 

“Wow. You fell into the craze for these chips?”

 

Yoongi chuckles as he opens the bag. “They’re alright.” Yoongi doesn’t say more, instead gesturing for Kihyun to try some for himself.

 

The chips are a nice mixture of sweet and salty, though Kihyun only eats a few pieces; he isn’t very hungry. They sit there for awhile, Yoongi grabbing the remote nearby and turning on the television, asking if there’s anything Kihyun wants to watch. Kihyun shakes his head no, tells Yoongi to put on whatever he’s in the mood for. The movie he plays ends up being background noise, Yoongi not interested in what’s going on with the characters, wanting to catch up with what’s going on in Kihyun’s life instead. They end up talking about nothing and everything, both enjoying each other’s company and silently wondering how they had let their friendship fall to shambles. Yoongi tells Kihyun about work, about how things aren’t so shitty anymore. He’s happy, he supposes, tells Kihyun how he’s _happier_ now that Kihyun’s here- makes Kihyun’s heart skip a beat. Kihyun tells him about everyone, everyone excluding Wonho, decides maybe it’s better to tell him about Wonho another time- a time being when he actually wants to introduce the two to each other.

 

Throughout the night, Kihyun tries not to pay attention to it- to how Yoongi still remembers the little things about him, how he’s still comfortable around Kihyun after all this time, how there’s an aching in his heart and he’s trying his best to remember that there’s Wonho-  _Wonho’s enough_. Kihyun catches a sight of Yoongi’s smile, the one where his gums show and there’s a glimpse of his bottom teeth. Yoongi’s looking at Kihyun, and Kihyun really can’t help but think how _pretty_ Yoongi is. They’re both snapped back to reality when Yoongi’s cell rings. Yoongi tells him he’ll take just a second, only he doesn’t, ends up taking much longer. Kihyun wouldn’t say he’s eavesdropping, Yoongi’s standing _right there_ , Kihyun can’t help that he has good hearing.

 

“Baby,” he hears Yoongi call, and his heart fucking drops. “Why you up at this hour? Shit- it’s already- yeah, you got the early shift? Yeah, I’m at home- yeah, we’re still on for lunch, ‘course. Love you.”

 

Yoongi returns and Kihyun’s heart is racing a mile a minute. _Why_ , he wonders, it’s not a big deal, Kihyun has a lover himself. Right, _Wonho_.

 

“Sorry, that was- Jimin, my boyfriend,” Yoongi explains. “You know the bag of honey butter chips we had?” Kihyun nods. “Well, he’s the one who bought me a box load of those.” Kihyun sees Yoongi smile to himself, it’s a soft one, one of fondness. “We haven’t been together long- but he’s sweet, and I think it’d be nice if you two met each other, yeah?”

 

Just like that they’re friends again. Kihyun responds with a _sure_ , he’d love to meet Jimin. He checks the time on his phone, only to see it’s 5 in the morning and they’ve spent all these hours awake together without realizing. “Wow, look at the time…I should get going. It was really-“ Kihyun sucks in a breath. “really nice seeing you- again after all this time. Let’s- we should hang out soon.”

 

Yoongi walks Kihyun to the door, Kihyun gives a wave and exits with the door closing behind him. He’s walking, takes out his phone and decides to give Wonho a call. “Hey…”

 

There’s shuffling and groaning on the other end, fuck Kihyun forgot the time.

 

“Shit. Didn’t mean to wake you, I-“

 

“It’s fine, babe. What’s up? Something wrong?”

 

 _Nothing’s wrong_ , is what Kihyun wants to say, but instead settles with, “Can you come pick me up?”

 

Wonho’s there before he knows it. Wonho has one hand on the steering wheel, the other holding onto Kihyun’s hand. Wonho buys Kihyun breakfast, like he always does, but nothing’s the same. All Kihyun can think about is _him_ , and how they spent the whole night together, doing nothing more than talking, but it was enough and made Kihyun’s chest swell. They’re back at Wonho’s place in bed, their legs draped together, Wonho’s breaths evening out and slowly falling back to sleep. Kihyun sighs and buries his face in Wonho’s neck, breathes in the scent that isn’t _him_ , pulling the body that isn’t _his_ closer.

 

 

Wonho’s not enough.

**Author's Note:**

> im sry i love u wonho ;-;  
> sad endings are just........so much easier to do  
> summary courtesy of mandie (she's a doll i love her)


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